An eclectic collection of double-seater couches, fold-out chairs, beanbags and armchairs greeted disaster expert Dr Robert Gordon in Rochester last week when he met with a selection of business leaders to discuss the way forward.
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Sitting at the centre of the circle was a box of tissues, an indicator of the emotional nature of the conversation that was about to take place between the world-renowned psychologist and — in many cases — entrepreneurs profoundly affected by the October 2022 flood event.
The box of tissues was a fitting reminder of the fragile status of the Rochester community.
Dr Gordon, however, summed up the strength and single-minded nature of the session participants by saying “Rochester was in good hands’’ in relation to the people leading the charge towards a flood-free future.
Dr Gordon started working with victims of traumatic events 40 years ago, after the Victorian Ash Wednesday bushfires, and has since travelled the world to assist authorities in introducing coping and healing measures for victims of trauma.
The group included not only Rochester Business Network members, but also a strong sprinkling of representatives from mental health service providers Mind Australia and Partners in Wellbeing.
It was Dr Gordon’s second visit to Rochester since last year’s flood event and — just as he did earlier this year — he held the group spellbound with his words of wisdom in support of the recovery effort.
Rochester Community House flood recovery co-ordinator Tanya McDermott expertly planned Dr Gordon’s arrival in town just 24 hours after many community leaders had poured their heart out to members of Victoria’s flood inquiry in an emotion-charged day of reliving the events of the flood.
Business Victoria supplied funding to Rochester for the express purpose of supporting the business sector with a number of initiatives.
Another will follow next month, and Ms McDermott said the plan was to expand the services offered into a peer support network.
“Very early on it became apparent that there was a need to support the businesses,” Ms McDermott said.
“I have Rob (Dr Gordon) on speed dial.”
Business operators in Rochester have become “accidental counsellors’’ to their customer base, as almost every individual that walks in the door seeks to share their story and receive a sympathetic hearing.
Just about every business in the town, in one way of another, has had to negotiate the effects of floods, but Dr Gordon heard most had put their own mental health on hold to offer support to people that walked in their door.
While most who attended the session had been personally impacted by the flood, their role as a service provider to the community had short-circuited their ability to deal emotionally with the impact of the flood.
Many had to ignore their own emotions and provide not only vital goods and services, but do that while giving customers the chance to share their stories.
Dr Gordon heard that businesses had unintentionally become “safe places’’ for customers seeking to offload the frustrations of their personal circumstances on people they trusted and relied on in the recovery process.
Several said it had been impossible to find time to grieve their own personal loss as they attempted to provide empathy for their customers.
The makeshift counselling services offered across the counter were described by Dr Gordon as typical of people who just wanted to help people “get better’’.
“Not all floods are so traumatic, but this one was,” he said.
“People have responded with adrenalin and gone into survival mode.
“When people act on adrenalin, the actions are not always well thought out.”
Dr Gordon explained that only when the adrenalin had dissipated were people most effective.
He said the ‘cortisol phase’ of the recovery nurtured and repaired the body, and allowed people to work longer and harder for less reward.
He said this state allowed people to recharge by shutting down their feedback system and return to a considered state of mind.
Dr Gordon said it was impossible for businesses to serve a customer, listen to their problems and concerns, while also doing their own job and addressing their own problems.
“Because of the flood you are nice to customers; they don’t have to worry about you — you have to worry about them,” he said.
“The very infrastructure you have built to ensure the success of your business is unintentionally used by your customers to offload their problems.
“Being heard is a major contribution that Rochester business owners are making every day. People feel much better when they can talk with someone, and this is a fantastic service, to listen.
“You should all know that ‘listening is doing’.
“Being listened to instils hope. Some business people may not get much done physically, but they may have listened to every customer.”
Dr Gordon said, just like COVID-19, emotion was contagious.
“There is a difference between providing empathy and being sympathetic,” he said.
“Your job is something you step into, it is not your definition.”
He explained that business operators needed to acknowledge they were — first and foremost — there to do a job.
“Putting on your space suit, whatever it is for your business, is important,” he said.
Dr Gordon said people needed to remember to listen and — where they could — offer advice, but not take on and carry the problems of their customers.
“Customers will often go into free-wheeling mode, and while being empathic is important you need to stay out of sympathy mode,” he said.
He said, universally, he had witnessed people in business or leadership roles recognise other people’s problems and ignore their own.
Dr Gordon said because the issues facing them were often too big and too deep, people couldn’t see a way ahead.
“It is really important to listen to them. When we are listening to a stressed person one of the things we need to find is what are they missing,” he said.
“Being planned, efficient and following through will enable you to take a break from what is engulfing you and recognise your state of mind.”
Dr Gordon said disrupting the continuity of the stress was as simple as re-introducing pleasure and leisure to daily routines.
“If you say you are going to do something you enjoy for a little it breaks the pattern,” he said.
“A gardening or cooking project ... Pleasure, enjoyment and satisfaction is the answer.
“Hold a few hours on a Sunday afternoon and gradually learn to use it.
“When you don’t have anything to do is when you get perspective on things. You need this or you won’t be able to complete the complicated tasks.”
He recommended that business operators attempt to send their customers out the door with one idea.
“These people are having the same problems as you. Take credit for helping people,” he said.
“The result of what you say to people will show up later.”
More events and workshops are being planned by the Rochester Community House team and those interested in accessing those services should stay in contact with Ms McDermott at the Mackay St headquarters of the organisation.
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